Have you ever left a friend/neighbour/employee and were concerned they were in an abusive relationship, but weren’t sure what the signs of abuse are? At the heart of abusive relationships is the issue of power and control. Every relationship is unique, but below are some general guidelines.
Warning signs that she might be experiencing abuse:
- She is not allowed to spend money or has to account for any/all money spent
- She makes excuses or is apologetic for her partner’s behaviour
- She’s nervous about speaking when in the presence of her partner; she’s not herself around him
- Seems to be sick more often; frequently missing school and/ or work
- She has frequent “accidents”, covers up bruises
- She’s sad, lonely, afraid and/or seems “jumpy”
- She cancels plans at last minute or tries to avoid meeting in person
- She needs to check-in via texts or phone calls frequently when away from her partner even when at work
Warning signs he might be abusive:
- He keeps tabs on her whereabouts, who she’s with, when she’ll be home, how long she was gone
- He acts as though he is superior to her
- He speaks poorly of her, her family and/or friends in front of you
- He answers for her in conversations with others
- He tries to get sympathy from others as though he is the victim
- He is manipulative
- He isolates her from others, important events, family gatherings
It is also important to remember that domestic violence can also occur in same sex relationships.
Terra and Lisa L.